Modesty... Ewww.... That's Weird

I'm sure you've had this experience. Either someone has said something to you, making you feel uncomfortable in your standards or maybe even you looked in the mirror and thought, "Wow... I look weird." In our culture, the styles and fashions of today are farther and farther from what we know and believe to be appropriate. 

In our religious culture, we are constantly urged and encouraged to be modest. Unfortunately, as we get older this becomes harder and harder as pressure from friends, society, and our other areas of life seems to encourage something completely different. Modesty really isn't about not being fashionable or showing your unique style as much as it is about expressing yourself in a way that also allows you to hold onto your feminine dignity. 

Now I am not going to straight out list rules for modesty here because every family has different definitions of what is appropriate and what is not. At this point, I am an adult and these decisions are mine to make so my general rule for myself is just asking myself, "Does this outfit show respect for the body that God has given me without objectifying it?" 

When people see you dressing mindfully and valuing yourself highly, it naturally happens that they want to pull you down to where they are to make themselves feel more confident. It's important to remember that it is no judgment on you but instead a reflection of their own self-consciousness. Many times when a woman dresses in a way that is revealing or immodest, it can be hard to see someone who seems confident in themselves but is still dressed with dignity. 

Now though I'm not giving you rules for what is and is not modest, I CAN give some tips on how to express your style as well as wear things you see and love while still remaining modest. 

Number one, layering!!!!! This is such a simple concept but so many people don't understand how to do it. A forever staple in my closet has always been close-fitting black long and short-sleeve shirts as well as a variety of cardigans and button-ups. I wear my shirts under dresses that otherwise might be inappropriate. 

As far the cardigans and button ups, I mostly use these over my sleeveless dresses as well as with tanktops I have fallen in love with. The dress in the image above might be a bit short but the idea is the same. 

Leggings under everything!!! This can be a family thing but I know growing up shorter things can be gotten away with if you have leggings under them though not always a church option. It can be really fun to play around with different colored leggings and shoes. I really love the picture below and may try to even mimic it soon!

One of the biggest complaints I here is that by dressing modestly woman feel they look swamped or figureless in their clothing. This can easily be fixed by tucking things in and playing around with belts. I have a few belts and always remove the sashes from my dresses to keep them in a drawer to mix and match. I also love to look for long skirts that fit comfortably around my waist.

 

Another easy trick is having a variety of undershirts for items that are too low or croptops that are super cute but immodest if worn alone. 

One of my favorite things to do to exercise my mind and help myself dress modestly is to find style icons that fit my personal style and inspire me. For me I love Sofia Carson, Nina Dobrev, Emma Watson, and Selena Gomez. These women have incredible styles but are often inappropriate in their dress. A fun way to get better at feeling good about your dress and staying modest is to take these outfits from icons you love and then brainstorm how you could make them modest. 

For this one I'd probably throw a red flannel on top and tie it at my waist.

This one would probably include some black leggings and a black long-sleeve shirt underneath. I'd also probably throw on some black combat boots to even further embrace my personal style. It can be as simple as these kinds of fixes. 

 

Outside of that, just experiment. You know your body. What is your favorite thing about yourself and how can you accentuate that in a way that embraces your true dignity as a woman. I wish you luck on your modesty journey and remember you can be fun, fashionable, AND modest. 

As always thank you for reading and feel free to comment, ask questions, give me ideas, and share with anyone this would help. I'll see you all next time!!!!