Four Steps to Success

 If you've ever heard the song "I Don't Dance" by Lee Brice, you know the story. It's a classic boy meets girl, falls in love, and finds himself thrust onto the dance floor spinning her around and around, despite his personal aversion to dancing. I have a personal love of this song because it recognizes something that every woman deserves and desires in a man, the ability to sacrifice for her. 

In this small instance it is an aversion to dancing but this can even be on a larger scale. My father in particular makes sacrifices every day for the good of his family. Whether it be giving up joining Special Forces in the military or just spending time watching his Gators football, he makes sacrifices of his own personal likes and dislikes in a show of love and generosity. 

Women are so used to selfishness. In this day and age, we see it in both us and others. In ourselves, we see it in the trouble we have giving up things we love for the good of those around us but, as naturally made emotional beings, we are more easily tempted to give up our loves for the comfort of others. Unlike us men struggle with this, and it can be especially hard when they aren't quite sure what we want. 

Us, women, are the masters of the cryptic request. We ask, "Do you like coffee?" a
nd we are secretly asking, "Will you take me out for coffee?" We ask them in round about ways for things and then are offended when they do not meet our requests. I've written out a list of four basic steps to approach a situation with your special boy to try to attain your request. 

Step one: Clearly define your desire.

This step allows the man to know exactly what you desire of him and put the need in clear daylight. Without this the man may have no idea your actual request. 

Step two: Explain your desire.

Explain why this is important to you. When you ask a many for something trivial such as, in the case of this song, a dance, he may not know why it is important to you. Explain why this is important. An example in terms of the dance could be, "because I love to dance and want to share something that is special to me with you."

Step three: Give them a chance.

Once again men have more trouble with this than we do. They look at requests and think, "Wow! This is a lot." while we see it more like an emotional relationship builder. Even when they mess up, give them another chance to come through. 

Step four: Praise success. 

If he comes through for you, show him how much it means to you. Thank him, express how this made you feel loved, and act in kind. 

This is challenging for every girl, whether she is in the pre-dating stage, dating, or married. You hear complaints from women all the time about the flaws of their husband. They complain constantly about what their boys constantly miss doing instead of encouraging them in what they succeed. When you give positive feedback, you may have better chances in the future of getting a similar outcome. 

Try this out and see how it goes for you. Please leave comments about any personal struggles or any stories of success. I always love hearing from you guys. Thanks for reading!